Find your circle
Most men want brothers around them. What they are missing is a place to meet them. This page gives you both options: groups you can join today, and a simple way to start your own if none of them feel right.
Brotherhood is not a feeling you are owed. It is a thing you build on purpose, week by week.
Walk into one that already exists.
Free, confidential men's groups meet every week across the UK. No referral, no booking. You only speak if you want to.
See the groupsStart your own five-man circle.
The most life-saving brotherhoods in the country have no website and no funding. Four men, three rules, one honest hour. Here is how.
Learn howThese run on a regular schedule and welcome new men every week. The ones marked turn up need no booking at all. Yes, even if you are the only Black face in the room the first time. The room gets more diverse the more we walk in.
Build your own
You do not need a venue, a charity, or a name. You need four other men and a promise to be honest. This is straight from the Brotherhood chapter, made into a plan.
1. Pick four men
Not your closest four necessarily. Four who might also be holding too much. A cousin, an old friend, a colleague, a man from the gym or the mosque or the church.
2. Agree the three rules
Say them out loud at the first meeting so everyone knows the deal. They are what turns a group chat into a brotherhood.
3. Meet, even small
Once a week in the chat, once a month in a kitchen. It feels strange the first three times. Then it becomes the most important hour of your month.
- We check in once a week. Even just a number out of ten. Silence is allowed, disappearing is not.
- We tell the truth. No performing. No I'm good when you are not. One true thing beats an hour of jokes.
- What is said here stays here. Nothing gets used against anyone, ever. That is what makes it safe.
Oi. I want to start a small thing. Five of us, checking in on each other once a week, telling the truth, nothing leaves the group. No pressure, no big speeches. Just men actually being real for once. You in?
If walking in feels like too much today, that is allowed.
You do not have to do the hardest version first. Telling one man one true thing is a circle of two. That counts. Start there, and widen it when you are ready.
If tonight is heavy, you never have to wait. Samaritans are free on 116 123, any hour. CALM is on 0800 58 58 58, 5pm to midnight.